of healthy role models in our culture can be discouraging when you consider the
influences your son has growing up. But with God’s help, you can help your son
successfully grow from a boy into the man God wants him to become. Intentionally
working with God to develop great character and faith in your son’s life is the
key to his success.
help him succeed in life:
Teach your son courage.
Courage encompasses both moral bravery (the ability to the do what’s right even
when faced with popular opposition, discouragement, or shame) and physical
bravery (boldly taking risks in the face of pain, hardship, or threats). A
public figure whose life exemplified courage was pastor and social activist
Martin Luther King Jr. Teach your son courage by: teaching him to embrace
challenges and take risks, letting him fail when he makes mistakes and helping
him learn from failure, celebrating with him when he succeeds and helping him
develop more confidence, and modeling courage in your own your life so you your
son can see what courage looks like in action in various
situations.
Teach your son honor and nobility. Honor involves
being honest and fair, as well as having integrity. An honest person’s beliefs
and actions work together, so he acts according to his beliefs. Nobility is a
part of honor and refers to a morally excellent character. The life of U.S.
Civil War general Robert E. Lee was a strong example of honor and nobility in
action. Teach your son honor and nobility by: teaching your son your core values
and why you believe them to be important, developing an honor code for your
family, setting high expectations for him and encouraging him to attempt great
things, helping him surround himself with friends who are trustworthy, volunteer
with your son to fight a specific type of social injustice that you both sense
God calling you to work on as a family, and teaching him good manners and
chivalry.
Teach your son duty. A dutiful person commits himself to
a cause even when doing so requires ignoring his own interests, so that he can
keep a moral commitment to someone or something. A public figure who lived an
extraordinary life of duty was former U.S. president George Washington. Teach
your son duty by: telling him that some causes are more important than an
individual’s own interests, helping him discover how God wants to use his life
to contribute to the world’s greater good, requiring him to do some tasks (like
household chores and school homework) whether or not he wants to do so, modeling
the importance of investing in dutiful relationships with family members, and
making him wait to fulfill some of his desires so he learns the value of delayed
gratification (such as saving up the necessary cash for a special purchase
rather than buying it on credit).
Teach your son integrity and
loyalty. Integrity involves the adherence to moral and ethical principles
(such as honesty), while loyalty involves being faithful to commitments made to
someone or something. Former college basketball coach John Wooden was one public
figure who lived a life of remarkable integrity and loyalty. Teach your son
integrity and loyalty by modeling both traits in your own life, such as by
making sure that your actions match your words and that you avoid speaking
negatively about people behind their backs. It’s also important to teach your
son critical thinking skills so he can learn how to determine what’s truth and
what’s false in various situations, and the importance of following the guidance
of biblical principles rather than his emotions when making
decisions.
Teach your son self-discipline. A self-disciplined
person trains and manages his feelings and behavior, so that he can develop
traits such as willpower, restraint, hard work, self-control, and persistence. A
famous example of someone who lived a life marked by self-discipline was former
U.S. president Theodore Roosevelt. Teach your son self-discipline by holding him
accountable for his choices, enforcing family rules, helping him learn how to
manage his time and control his emotions, and giving him opportunities to
contribute to your family’s household by doing chores on a regular
basis.
Teach your son perseverance. Perseverance encompasses
qualities such as persistence and tenacity, which help a person overcome
challenges and accomplish goals. Former U.S. president Abraham Lincoln’s life is
an inspiring example of perseverance in action. Teach your son perseverance by
showing him what it looks like to work hard, not allowing him to quit too easily
once he has undertaken a pursuit, allowing him to suffer the natural
consequences of his mistakes, and holding him accountable for the choices he
makes.
Teach your son toughness and resiliency. A tough, resilient
person is hardy enough to meet the mental, emotional, and physical challenges of
life head-on while trusting God to help him every step of the way. A public
figure whose life exemplified toughness and resiliency was U.S. explorer
Jedediah Smith. Teach your son to be tough and resilient by letting him
experience suffering without rescuing him from it except in emergencies,
encouraging him to set high goals and attempt difficult endeavors, and giving
him opportunities to compete with others as he develops and uses his
skills.
Teach your son common sense and wisdom. Common sense and
wisdom encompass the ability to accurately perceive and understand reality, and
the choice to seek God’s guidance for making the best decisions. U.S. statesman,
author, and inventor Benjamin Franklin lived a life of extraordinary common
sense and wisdom. Teach your son common sense and wisdom by encouraging him to
seek God’s guidance in prayer, mentoring him, giving him challenges to
accomplish, letting him learn from his mistakes, and celebrating his success
with rituals.
Teach your son vision. Vision involves wise
foresight into the future. A public figure who put vision into action well was
former U.S. president Thomas Jefferson. Teach your son vision by explaining how
you make long-term decisions and helping him anticipate likely outcomes of his
own long-term decisions.
Teach your son intellect. A person of
strong intellect is able to think things through well, to come to correct
conclusions about what’s true or real, to increase knowledge and understanding,
and to solve problems. Famous Italian artist and scientist Leonardo da Vinci
exemplified intellect well. Teach your son intellect by: teaching him critical
thinking skills, urging him to read a lot, giving him opportunities to discuss
and debate issues, and encouraging him to be a lifelong learner.
Teach
your son compassion and empathy. Compassion and empathy involve being
sensitive to other people’s suffering and taking caring action to help them.
English orphanage director and evangelist George Muller is a famous example of
someone who lived with extraordinary compassion and empathy. Teach your son
compassion and empathy by giving him opportunities to serve people in need, and
to care for pets.
Teach your son to be a warrior-poet. A
warrior-poet is a person who works to keep both his mind and body in optimal
health. A famous example is David, the biblical king. Teach your son to become a
warrior-poet by balancing his mental development (such as music lessons) with
his physical development (like sports).
[written by Whitney
Hopler]
