Looking at God’s
example of forgiveness and how it is modeled throughout Scripture brings insight
to what true forgiveness really looks like lived out in a practical, everyday
sort of way.
forgive others in your own life, I pray these 7 truths about forgiveness will
spur you on to keep making every effort to forgive.
1. True Forgiveness Renews
Outlook
Films, books, and TV shows have characters who say lines such as
“I’ll forgive you but I’ll never look at you the same way” and so on. But when
God forgives, His outlook of the person who has been forgiven isn’t tarnished by
past behavior and decisions but refreshed and renewed, like past offenses never
happened.
Isaiah 1:18 illustrates God’s perspective when He says, “‘Come
now, let us settle the matter,’ says the LORD. ‘Though your sins are like
scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they
shall be like wool.’”
Becoming a parent helped me to understand this
concept better than any other type of relationship in life. My little one could
disobey, be difficult and throw tantrums, but then one look at her sweet face
and I didn’t see any of her past bad behavior, only my much-loved child.
2. True Forgiveness Reflects God’s Glory
Proverbs 19:11
states, “It is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” This encourages me that
when I forgive another for something they did or didn’t do, I reflect the nature
of God to those around me.
One time during a cross-country family
vacation, our family was seated at the back of a very crowded plane. One row
behind us, a young mother and her three young children squeezed into a couple of
seats, making a loud commotion as they arrived.
We could hear the
negative comments from other passengers questioning her mothering skills,
criticizing her decision to squeeze three kids into two seats on such a long
flight.
Having traveled cross-country alone with small children, we
empathized with her situation. Seeming stressed, tired, and at the end of her
rope as passengers made disparaging comments and shot disdaining looks her way,
my husband stepped in and asked if he could help by playing with one of her
toddlers.
She jumped at his offer and it immediately changed the attitude
in the plane, calming not only the mom’s demeanor but also her critics on the
flight.
As I observed the other passengers dropping their disapproval and
becoming more supportive of this family, I realized that forgiveness doesn’t
just benefit the ones offering it and being forgiven, but also all those who
witness forgiveness in action.
3. True Forgiveness is God’s Will
As a Christian, I really
don’t need to seek God’s will about whether to forgive someone or not because
it’s very clear in Scripture that forgiveness is God’s will. It’s not something
dependent upon a situation or a person.
Jesus states in Matthew 6:14,
“If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father
will also forgive you.”
It’s not something up for debate, discussion,
pro-con lists, vote, polling, and so on. So when statements are made that some
things are unforgivable or someone will never forgive another, it’s clearly not
reflecting God’s will in a situation.
As Jesus
hung on the cross, He asked God to forgive those crucifying Him, pleading their
case, for “they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34).
Scripture
describes a similar scene when Stephen is being stoned and he cries out
concerning those killing him, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them” (Acts
7:60).
Both examples model not only forgiving offenders in the most
extreme situations but also going further to seek forgiveness for those who are
committing the offenses.
It’s easy to decide to limit
how many times I’ll allow someone to disappoint or hurt me through his or her
actions or behaviors. Yet when Peter asked Jesus, “’Lord, how many times shall I
forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus
Answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven'” (Matthew
18:21-22).
Especially with families, years of trespasses can build-up and
foster unforgiving hearts. As a hospice chaplain, my husband ministers to
individuals during end-of-life situations. Sadly, patients often face issues
involving a lifetime of unresolved hurts and disappointments with family
members. Seeking to bring peace to their lives, as well as to their family, he
looks for opportunities to facilitate forgiveness and reconciliation among them,
a process requiring unlimited mercy for past offenses.
In daily life it
may be simply forgiving the person in my neighborhood who is rude every time we
pass on the sidewalk. Or the co-worker who takes credit for my ideas. Or,
forgiving myself for past failures.
I’ve often heard people say
forgiving does not mean forgetting. Yet Isaiah 43:25 describes God’s
forgetfulness of my sins stating, “I, even I, am he who blots out your
transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”
It makes me think of how as a wife, I can tell my husband he’s forgiven
but then the next time he slips up, I bring up things from a year ago. Instead
of giving him a clean slate, I remember, adding up his offenses as I go,
building an ongoing case against him. In comparing how God forgives me, my
remembering his former transgressions may be an indication that I haven’t really
forgiven him.
Unlike my tendency to keep a record, God’s forgiveness
clears my account of wrong doings, stating “As far as the east is from the west,
so far has He removed our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103:12).
It seems in life it’s easier
to forgive someone who has made a mistake or error that I’ve experienced, too.
Knowing how it feels to be regretful for a similar action or situation helps me
to empathize and have compassion.
However, in situations where I haven’t
experienced what it’s like, God still urges me to forgive. This can prove at
times to be much harder to live out, especially in circumstances that are very
difficult, hurtful, or seem unjust.
Often as individuals, it’s easy to
want to make people jump through hoops or prove they are worthy to receive
forgiveness. However, just like I have freely received forgiveness for my sins
through Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:6-7), Scripture encourages me to freely
forgive.
Ephesians 4:32 reminds me to, “Be kind and tender-hearted to one
another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.”
God’s model of true forgiveness
involves my having a renewed outlook, reflecting His glory, choosing His will,
and seeking forgiveness for offenders. It also includes my removing limitations
on mercy, forgetting wrongdoings, and freely forgiving others as I have been
forgiven.
[written by Lynette Kittle]
